Girl mothers

BY JECKONIA OTIENO At Class Six, Felis Lewa had dreams to complete her primary schooling, join secondary school and higher levels of education but this suffered a setback educationally when she discovered she was pregnant with her first child. Lewa, 17, who is now in her final year in primary school says that had she known better she would have waited because she could have concentrated more on her education. The pupil at Gandini Primary School looks back and says peer pressure contributed greatly to her situation. She says, “I had a friend in the same class in this school and she had a boyfriend; she told me that she would help me get a boyfriend.” The go-between introduced Lewa and the boy who was also in the same class. One evening after the introductions as Lewa was walking to the market when the boy appeared from nowhere and confessed how much he loved her. One sweet nothing led to another as a number of weeks elapsed before mature matters set in. Narrates Lewa: “We had sports competition here in school so we took the opportunity during the day to vanish and that was the first time we engaged in sex.” The second time when the two got intimate was at the boy’s home. However, Lewa got worried when she missed her monthly period and she suspected she was pregnant. Without even going to check in a health facility, she just told the boy who offered to buy her drugs so that she could terminate the pregnancy. “He brought some pills and told me to swallow them when I get home and I just told him I would but when I got home I threw them away,” reveals Lewa. The girl who has been living with her grandmother because she does not know her father says that she waited for her mum to come visit before she told her about the pregnancy. Her mum and grandma resolved that she would carry the pregnancy to full term. They then resorted to inform the boy’s parents who denied flatly that their son was too young impregnate any girl. Meanwhile, Lewa’s uncles were pushing a motion that she should go and live together with the boy. With the boy and his family refusing to take responsibility, Lewa stayed at her grandparents home until she delivered. She took a year off school to care for the baby. She is now back in school and raring to go on with her education. Lewa says that the saddest part of it all is that girls her age see her as an outcast and they avoid her as plague. She confesses, “Even my own friend who introduced to this boy abandoned me yet she was the one who encouraged me to have a boyfriend like her.” Lewa’s case is just a mirror of many other cases that plague Kaloleni area of Kilifi County. Many girls get involved in teenage relationships which end up jeopardising their future. Raymond Kiti, a teacher in one of the schools in the area says that the tragedy of it all is that the problem is widespread both in primary and secondary schools in the area. He blames the local video dens where the youth watch videos some as illicit as pornography “When they leave the place, each person carries his mate and they can then engage in sex before they finally go home,” states Kiti. Also blamed is the weekly market day at Mwembe Kati where young lovers meet to ‘chat the way forward’ every Thursday. Anderson Chigulu of Chonyi Childright Movement Action says that it is common for children to skip school but go to the market. Poverty is a major factor that contributes to early sexual engagements. Many children go without food so they turn to men who flaunt money just to survive. These supposed Good Samaritans who give these girls food end up turning them into small wives because of the desperate conditions in which they live. Parents are being accused of having neglected their duties of bringing up their children. Douglas Muchiri who is the secretary of World Starts With Me, an outreach programme of the Centre for the study of Adolescents (CSA) says that most parents being illiterate do not care whether their children are in school or not. “Some parents even encourage their children to get married early so that they can earn bridewealth,” states Muchiri sadly. Muchiri who is also a teacher at Dr Krapf High School in Rabai notes that poverty alleviation would the first step in curbing teenage pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections including HIV. Just like in many other parts of Kenya, the bodaboda menace is also rife in Coast; they riders are accused of luring young school girls with free rides and cheap gifts after which they engage them sometimes even marrying them for a season before the marriages break. Societal norms have compounded these problems as locals attest. Night dances during weddings and funerals have contributed to moral decadence. Lilian Hassan notes that it is very sad that when people go for these dances, the children see their parents dance and leave with other women or men who are not their spouses. She questions, “What moral authority would a parent have to tell a child to stop sleeping around if the child sees the parent leave the dances with other women or men?” Hassan also says that parents need to be more concerned about their children by asking them where they get money to buy items that they clearly cannot afford and demanding that the goods be returned wherever they are from.